I THINK I MURDERED MY PEN PAL
by SakuChan5
Summary: Sakura:17 year old high school student is given a pen pal assignment. What happens when Sakura is forced to write to a stuck up spoiled brat named Syaoran Li who seems to have nothing better to do then piss Sakura off to no end with his smart ass remarks
1. MEET KING BABUSHA AKA SAKU

Ok umm this story is about a girl named Sakura Kinomoto who is assigned a project to write letters to a pen pal in Hongkong for 3 months. The whole story will be written in the forms of letters coming back and forth. Truly promising and hilarious...If you're interested review and the next chappie will include Syaoran's response and a longer vhappie is promised. Thx! Bye!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN CCS IN ANY WAY OK?? OK?? OK?? TU COMPRENDE? YA OK GOOD!

**I HATE MY PEN PAL- CHAPTER 1**

**Dear lil wolf**

**They call me the queen of the Nile...some call me KING BABUSHA! You can call me Sakura..YUP that's my name. Sakura! Sakura! SAKURA! hehehe When my teacher Mr.Takashi told me about this pen pal project I was PISSED yes PISSED...but it's worth 50 percent of my final grade so I'M FORCED TO DO THIS! TRY NOT TO FALL ASLEEP AND TRY TO BARE WITH ME FOR THE NEXT 3 MONTHS! **

**Heres a list of things we HAVE to tell our pen pals in order to be polite so here goes:**

**1. Your interests**

**2. Your friends**

**3.Your likes and Dislikes**

**4. 1 seceret **

**Ya i no wut ur thinking BORING...so i'm going to tell u anyways! MWAHAHAHAHA**

**Interests: Hmmmmmmmmmmm I'm a skateboarder...and i live by this moto "PIE IS SEXY" Don't you agree??**

**Friends: Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm I have a best friend named TOMOYO ...she's CRAZY!!! She's hyper 24/7 her favorite pass time is playing with her life sized barbie doll A.K.A ...ME! But no that doesn't mean I have blonde hair fake plastic boobs and a fake nose job! In fact my hair is awesome PRICELESS AUBURN LOCKS if i say so myself! I've sold them for 10 dollars a strand!!!!!!!**

**Likes and Dislikes: WARNING I AM ABOUT TO SING A SONG: (BARNEY STYLE)**

**I HATE YOU! YOU HATE ME! LET'S GANG UP AND KILL MR.TAKASHI!!!!!! CUZ HE'S GAY AND FAT AND HITS ON ALL THE GIRLS SO WHY NOT KILL THE MAN WHORE SQUIRREL yaaaaaaaaa he resembles a life sized squirrel...cough cough**

Some times i wonder if life would have been better had I not murdered my dog at the age of three and buried his guts in my neighbour's yard...poor lady died of a heart attack at 23...THAT WILL REMAIN A SECERET BETWEEN U AND ME! Seeing as how we'll never meet each other you being in HONG KONG! and me being here in JAPAN! it should be ok and besides you don't know my NAME HEHEHE MWHAHAHHAH!

Yours sincerely: KING BABUSHA! 8P


	2. MEET LIL WOLF AKA SYAO

Ok umm this story is about a girl named Sakura Kinomoto who is assigned a project to write letters to a pen pal in Hongkong for 3 months. The whole story will be written in the forms of letters coming back and forth. Truly promising and hilarious...If you're interested review and the next chappie will include Syaoran's response and a longer vhappie is promised. Thx! Bye!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN CCS IN ANY WAY OK?? OK?? OK?? TU COMPRENDE? YA OK GOOD!

LOL 2 reviews haha yes i know it was very ooc but i hope you like it anyways because i'm only writing this as a romatic comedy so it's bound to be a bit ooc . Afterall things are often exaggerated when writing in letters so...HOPE YOU ENJOY ANYWHO! THANK YOU TO TE PEOPLE THAT REVIEWED YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**I HATE MY PEN PAL- CHAPTER 2**

**Dear King Babusha**

Frankly you sound like a dumbass so I rather you not keep writing to me. I fear your idiocy may be contagious.

"Pie is sexy" HOW THE HELL DO YOU FIND PIE SEXY???!!? IS THERE A HIDDEN MESSAGE IN THEIR SOMEWHERE?? IS THAT LIKE CODE FOR BEING A DRUGGIE??? ARE YOU ON DRUGS?? WERE YOU HIGH WHEN YOU WROTE THAT LETTER CUZ FRANKLY SPEAKING YOU TOLD ME YOUR NAME AT THE START OF THE LETTER SA-KU-RA!

What gives you the idea that i actually care about you and your lunatic friend Tomoyo? For all I know you two could be a pair of LESBOS and I wouldn't give a damn.

And as for that crazy barnie song it made me wonder whether you would be willing to fk your teacher for good grades too...you seem like a goody two shoes not that that's a bad thing...well actually it pretty much is as far as i'm concerned makes me wonder how you ended up being a skater.

Oh and just cuz you told me your seceret i'll tell you mine:) I had a dream last night where I made out with an AUBURN haired chick wonder who she was...

Try not torture me with another letter it'd be greatly appreciated.

WORST WISHES:

YOUR, HOPEFULLY EX.PENPAL

LIL WOLF

AND FOR THE RECORD YOU'RE A WIERDO!


	3. Saku: IM NOT A LESBO!

Ok umm this story is about a girl named Sakura Kinomoto who is assigned a project to write letters to a pen pal in Hongkong for 3 months. The whole story will be written in the forms of letters coming back and forth. Truly promising and hilarious...If you're interested review and the next chappie will include Syaoran's response and a longer vhappie is promised. Thx! Bye!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN CCS IN ANY WAY OK?? OK?? OK?? TU COMPRENDE? YA OK GOOD!

**REVIEWS NEEDED! THX GUYS!**

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**DEAR LITTLE WOLF!**

**I am NOT a DUMBASS this coming from a 17 year old PERVERT! What do you do rape girls at night????!?? And FYI idiocy is not contagious if you felt it was then you're simply a BAKA your self:)**

**And no I am not a DRUGGIE but I suppose it takes one to know one eh lil wolf? Your chinese right?? What's your name lil wolf...hmm Syaoran? Syaoran means little wolf doesn't it? I do ADMIT that I left my name in my previous letter but I was writing it at seperate intervals between cheer practice so I suppose it just slipped my mind so SUE ME! **

**AND YES I ADMIT I'M A PREP!!!!!! IS IT A CRIME TO BE BOTH AN AWESOME SKATER AND A PREP?????!!?**

**No i would not fuck my teacher but it doesn't seem to be something uncommon where you come from eh? I TOLD YOU I HAVE TO DO THIS OR ELSE I FAIL! WHAT PART OF FAIL DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND??!! YOU'RE NOT MEANTALLY DISABLED ARE YOU? CUZ IF YOU ARE THEN I MIGHT FEEL GUILTY...8p**

**Your "seceret" you were trying to freak me out so that i woudn't write back well it didn't work so FUCK OFF and stop acting all big and bad cuz you're a WIERDO YOURSELF as far as i'm concerned! SO BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!!!! **

**AND GET THIS THROUGH YOUR FAT ASS HEAD! I AIN'T A **_LESBO_**! I AM **_STRAIGHT_**! EWWWWWWWWW giving me the goosebumps just thinking of the crap you probably dream up all night long! **

**Even if you don't write back i'm going to keep writing so** _PISS OFF_

**Your truly**

**Sa-ku-ra :)**


	4. I STALK YOU IN YOUR DREAMS

Disclaimer: I do not own ccs in any way or the characters involved. I simply own this plot and this fanfic!

**AWWWWWWWWWWWWW Thank you 4 all of those AWESOME reviews!!!!!!!!!! I'm glad you guys like it!!!!!!!!!!! **

**Gives you all a gigantic AIR HUG : )**

**-----------------------------------------**

I THINK I MURDERED MY PEN PAL- CHAPTER 3

Dear SA-KU-RA :)

PLEASEEEEEEE DON'T GO ALL PMSING ON ME NOW SAKU CHAAAAAN!

Is it really that hard for you not to write to me?? ARE YOU IN LOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WITH ME??

No I don't rape girls at night but i'd visit **_you_** in your dreams any day if you asked me 2!

OMG UR NOT A DRUGGIE!!!!!!!??? WOW 0-0 NOW THAT'S NEWS TO ME!!!!!! I would have thought you were considering the fact that you said you sold locks of your hair for ten dollars a piece in your FIRST LETTER! YES INDEED RING A BELL!!?? I THINK SO! YOUR IN DENIAL MISSY!! WHAT ARE YOU ON? POT? HEROINE? ECSTACY!!??ADMIT IT! YOU NEED HELP! ...XD ON second thought maybe you could use a bit of ANGER MANAGEMENT 2! YOU SWEAR LIKE HELL MAN! No need to sympathize with me i ain't disabled... :p

Another big surprise I guess you really aren't a FAKE BOOBED, BLONDE HAIRED, FAKE NOSED, BIMBO CUZ YUP my name's SYAORAN! Nice to meet you Saku-Chan. IT'S a MIRACLE YOUR NOT AS STUPID AS YOU SEEM...HMMM A LITTLE TOO SMART FOR A ANGER CRAZED DRUGGIE THOUGH DON'T YOU THINK? ...Try not to hurt yourself then i'd have no one to makeout with anymore:P

OKAY Sooooooooo you're not a _LESBO I GET IT! _**YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT BI THOUGH? YOU KNOW INTERSTED IN BOTH GUYS AND GIRLS CUZ HONESTLY SAKU CHAN I DON'T LIKE BEING SECOND STRING! IT'S EITHER TOMOYO CHAN OR ME! OR IT IS OVER!!!! **_Evil i know but what can i say i'm special that way..._

_**nitey nite saku-chan the quicker the sooner we can get things rolling if you know what i mean eh? I wonder if you're hot..hmmm lol**_

Cya

UR DREAM HOTTIE SYAORAN

Ps: When's your birthday?


	5. I aM hOtTeR tHaN yOu!

Disclaimer: I do not own ccs in any way or the characters involved. I simply own this plot and this fanfic!

**OMG WOOOOOW I TOTALLY 4GOT ABOUT THIS STORY! I AM SOOO SORRY! I was actually reading this story and laughing my ass of when i realized it was my own. XD lol**

**Gives you all a gigantic AIR HUG : )**

**SOSOSOSOSO SORRY! ONCE AGAIN! THIS CHAPTER IS ESPECIALLY DEDICATED TO: BLUERELIC! o**

**ccs's cherry blossom :Thx 4 that kick lol**

**and **

**shortash12 : You owe me a banana! But since it's a late update i'll take an apple instead...xD**

**and of course i love the rest of you guys too!! Try not to strangle me when you see this update! lol**

**-----------------------------------------**

I THINK I MURDERED MY PEN PAL- CHAPTER 5

**TO THE PERSON I HATE MOST**

**I HATE YOU!!!**

**I HATE YOU!! **

**I HATE YOU!!**

I hope this clears things up! **ME** hate **YOU**! I AM NOT IN **_LOVE_** WITH YOU BECAUSE I **_HATE_** YOU TOO MUCH AND I AM **_NOT _**A DRUGGIE!

I am not bi!!! I am STRAIGHT!! How many times must i repeat myself!!?? Maybe your psychotic!! Forget being disabled your too F-IN MESSED in the head FOR THAT!! I am soooo PISSED!

**_YOU SYAORAN LI SUCK!!! _**

Frankly speaking i think i'll stop writing letters to you now. MAYBE this grade isn't worth it after all. **They don't give me enough to deal with a self- obssesed, psychotic, PERVERT! AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION I AM HOTTER THAN YOU'LL EVER BE! SO BURN!! You know you're too ugly for me. SO stop dreaming about me RIGHT NOW! IF YOU DON'T I PROMISE TO STALK YOU IN YOUR DREAMS AND MURDER YOU! WITH A GIANT RUBBER CHICKEN. YES that's right you heard me!! **

**KING BABUSHA AND GIANT RUBBER CHICKENS SHA'LL RULE THE WORLD!!!! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!**

**cough cough...About time you realized im not a bimbo. I THINK THAT says something about you! **

**WHOS DUMB NOW?**

**UH HUH UH HUH UH HUH UH HUH THATS WHAT I THOUGHT!!! **

**Are you a Male version of a bimbo? Maybe you're a lesbo that had surgery to become a dude. BUT DUDE i dont swing that way. This would explain why you're jealous of Tomoyo chan even though I've ALREADY made it clear that "SAKU NO LESBO!" So keep you're distance syao chan. I don't date girls. That's right...Please don't turn emo on me. 8P**

**(smirk) Yours truly SAKU CHAN **

**REVIEWS NEEDED-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Next one will be updated latest by friday or earlier!! runs off b4 the tomatos start bombing **


	6. MY NUMBER 1 FANGIRL

Disclaimer: I do not own ccs in any way or the characters involved. I simply own this plot and this fanfic!

LOL Disclaimer #2: The disclaimer above was copyed from another fanfic because I lacked the imagination to come up with one of my own...LOL...gomennnn... I did paraphrase it though...if splitting a run along sentence in two counts as paraphrasing...

Ps: If anyone understands disclaimer # 2 : THERES HOPE FOR ME YET!! ...sort of...lol..

Moving on with our lives...-sweat drops-

DUDES AND DUDETTES: SHOWER ME WITH TOMATOES...I guess saying sorry won't help...SHRIEKS: "OMG ITS AN UPDATE!!"...RUNS OFF...--mutter mutter MORE LIKE A MIRACLE!! mutter mutter--...

THINK I MURDERED MY PEN PAL- CHAPTER 6

**To the person that (secretly) _LOVES_ me most..But is in denial...**

ALright I get it...UR NOT **BI**...and ur not a druggie...BUT ur still **psychotic**...I guess we have that in common though 8P.

OH GOSH you've got a real murder streak eh? First the neighbour's dog and now ..little old me? **BUT FEAR NOT!!** I syaoran Li will not abandon my number 1 fangirl. **BUT** what about everyone else? I mean _picture this._

**Random person # 1:** Hey man! who's the chick?

**Me:** My # 1 fangirl of course. -radiant smile-

**Random person # 2: -**Pokes her- What's with the bloody meat knife?

**Me: **Why she's a butcher of course!! -radiant smile-

**Random person # 3: -**Randomly walks up and pokes her hair with a stick- What about the innards in her hair? ...They're still moving...

**Me:** -Nervous laughter- ahahaha...ughhh yaaa the life of a butcher ..tough man..he he...ahhh...-tries to pick out the eyeballs-

**Random people: **-back away slowly-...

**XD...** do you honestly own a giant rubber chicken? Don't tell me it's a lesbo thing? :D? NO WAIT how about you go out and buy yourself a giant stuffed wolf and name it syaoran instead? I mean that way you could be more at ease with your undying loveeeeee for me. Go ahead and obssess and do the whole fangirl thing. GET OVER TOMOYO...

AND PUH-LEEASE like you could ever stop writing to me. YOUR addicted saku chaaaaaan admit ittttttt. **YOU LOVE ME :)**

**I **Syaoran Li will continue to stalk you in your dreamsssssssssssssss...like you want me too!!

YOURS TRULY: Syaoran Li ...muwhahaha.. (oh gosh bakaness IS addictive lol)

PS: I still don't know your birthday.

PPS: If you really want to murder me.. :( you'll have to do it in person...maybe this weekend..?- hint hint-

...

Peopleeeeeeeeeeeeee forgiveeeeeeeeee the baka who writes this story. ITS SUMMER finally...well actually it's half over...**XD though I guess that just makes things worse. **My point IS my writer's block is over and im full of inspiration ...soooo im gonna push myself before september and try to get you guys as much updates as possible...I've also got alot of ideas for some new fanfics..so look forward to it and reviewwwwwww puh-leeseeeeee!! Aishiteruu mina!!


End file.
